Swinging And Stinging!

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I haven’t posted on here for a while.  The main reason is our kink life has been a bit quiet.  OK, make that a LOT quiet.  Sure, Mistress would from time to time give me a dozen with the cane or 10 or 20 with the frat paddle just to keep me in line.

But life has been kicking our butts lately.  That’s not the good kind of butt kicking.  But the other day I found this holey paddle you can see in the pic above.  That has livened things up!  The last three days She has paddled my ass with that thing.  It’s smaller and lighter than the long heavy frat paddle.  Which means it delivers a sharper sting.  Of course the holes make for less wind resistance which means the damn thing travels faster.  More ouch for your swing!

The top pic was after 30 hard strokes on Monday.  As you can see it reddens my bottom nicely!  The sting really takes my breath away.  The redness actually lasts for a while too.  Bonus!

Swinging And Stinging!

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I haven’t posted on here for a while.  The main reason is our kink life has been a bit quiet.  OK, make that a LOT quiet.  Sure, Mistress would from time to time give me a dozen with the cane or 10 or 20 with the frat paddle just to keep me in line.

But life has been kicking our butts lately.  That’s not the good kind of butt kicking.  But the other day I found this holey paddle you can see in the pic above.  That has livened things up!  The last three days She has paddled my ass with that thing.  It’s smaller and lighter than the long heavy frat paddle.  Which means it delivers a sharper sting.  Of course the holes make for less wind resistance which means the damn thing travels faster.  More ouch for your swing!

The top pic was after 30 hard strokes on Monday.  As you can see it reddens my bottom nicely!  The sting really takes my breath away.  The redness actually lasts for a while too.  Bonus!

The Sting Of The Cane

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So Mistress gave me nine strokes of the cane today.  Simply because She can.  For some reason my bottom really marked this time, more so than usual.  Maybe it’s because I haven’t been caned for a while.  I haven’t been spanked either.  Mainly because I haven’t been well.  I’ve had a cough for a few weeks that I just haven’t been able to shake off.  I hate when that happens.

So today Mistress got it in Her head that She wanted to cane me.  And what Mistress wants, Mistress gets.  So I bent over the bed, legs apart, bottom stuck out and waited for that first painful stroke.  The first one is always the worst.  It doesn’t matter how ready you think you are, you can never be fully prepared for the sharp sting of that first stroke.  It really make a you catch your breath.  The pain seems to cut right through you.  The tradition of the cane is supposed to be ‘six of the best.’. Mistress doesn’t go much for that tradition.  Her favourite number is nine.  So nine strokes of the cane it was.  Each stripe blazed its trail across my naked cheeks.  I was really squirming by the end.  But I’m proud of the way I can take a caning.  For some reason the marks never seem to last long, but the pic was taken just a few minutes after I received the last stroke.  I think I marked quite well this time.  Probably because I haven’t been beaten in while.  It was good to feel the biting sting of the cane again.  I’ve missed it!

In the mood to show

I’m in an exhibitionistic mood so here are some pics.  As you can see Mistress knows how to redden my bottom!

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In the mood to show

I’m in an exhibitionistic mood so here are some pics.  As you can see Mistress knows how to redden my bottom!

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Just some thoughts of a male slave

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I shared this on Google+ and it got some good feedback so I thought I’d share it as a blog.

Feet.  Oh, how I hate feet.  I feel like  I must be the only male sub/slave who doesn’t like feet, especially going by all the foot worship pics I see daily both on G+ and on Twitter.  And yet I’ve gotten to like giving Mistress a foot massage. 

Why?  Because I know how much Mistress enjoys it.  And making Mistress happy makes me happy.  I must be a service oriented slave because I’ve always enjoyed doing things for Her.  From the most simple menial tasks upward.  Even going near her feet.  Note, I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with her feet.  They’re not sweaty, or extra stinky.

I just don’t like feet.

I enjoy doing things for Mistress, even if it’s things I don’t like or enjoy doing.  Mistress can do anything She likes to me, or make me do anything She wants me to do.  I can say this with confidence because, after nine years of marriage, I know what She likes.  What She will do and what She absolutely will not do.  I know She won’t do anything extreme to me.  She won’t make do anything illegal or potentially life threatening.  But within those limits there may be things I don’t enjoy or really don’t like.  Whatever it might be I’ll willingly do them for Her.  Because making Mistress happy is what I like the most.

Understanding the FemDom dynamic

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I actually posted this on a community on Google+ but thought it deserves to be a blog in its own right.

I’ve been looking at a few blogs from the FemDom perspecrive, reading posts by both dominant women and submissive men.  One thing I’ve noticed that is very different from the M/f dynamic is the tendency to belittle men.  Submissive men call themselves pathetic, useless, unworthy.  There is a tendency to put women in general on a pedestal, to treat them as some sort of superior species, as if they are above even the human race. 

Don’t get me wrong, I adore my Mistress.  She has control over me and can do whatever She likes to me.  But I don’t consider women to be superior generally.  Especially as there are more submissive women than dominant.  Or there certainly seems to be, anyway. 

My point is this is something you rarely see in M/f circles.  I’ve never seen a Dom describe a female sub as pathetic or unworthy of his attention.  And quite right, too.  Female sub’s are usually treated with much greater respect.

So where does this disdain of male subs come from.  Male subs often put themselves down as worthless, pathetic etc.  Is this some kind of overflow of the traditional view that men are supposed to be strong, dominant, masculine, while women are supposed to be soft, submissive, feminine?  Do many submissive men view themselves as worthless and pathetic because they don’t feel they live up to the stereotype?  And what do dominant women feel about this, really?  Do some of you see male subs as weak, pathetic for the same reasons?

I don’t view myself as weak.  Or pathetic.  Or worthless.  Thankfully, Mistress doesn’t treat me that way, either.  I submit to Her will.  She takes my submission.  We enjoy our roles and there’s a healthy respect on both our parts.

I’d love to get your thoughts on this.  Both male sub’s and female Dominants.

Understanding The Lifestyle

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To the uninitiated, to vanilla people, to people who are new to BDSM, and in particular to FemDom, t our lifestyle must be so hard to understand.  To connect with.

With the media perception of FemDom as the leather-clad, whip-wielding dominatrix, barking out orders and torturing Her victims in all sorts of fiendish ways.  That seems to be the typically male view of FemDom. 

No wonder vanilla people scratch their heads and wonder what it’s all about.

I’ve seen a lot of blogs out there questioning BDSM. 

Is it abuse?

What on earth could possess someone to want to turn to this kind of lifestyle?

I can’t explain it.  I have no idea why.  I can only speak from my personal perspective.  I have a deep seated need to serve.  To belong.  To be owned.  I do like to have my own free time.  But what Mistress wants comes first.  I’ve always felt the need to serve Her.  This need is deep in my soul.  I’m grateful Mistress has not only accepted my need but risen to the occasion and truly enjoys dominating me.  She has always enjoyed spanking me.  That particular kink is what brought us together.  She has taken to Her role like a duck takes to water.  I think She is really starting to test the limits of Her control of me.  I keep telling Her there are no limits.  She can do whatever She wants to do to me.  I can say this with confidence because I know Her so well.  She would not want to abuse Her power over me.  She’s also not into anything crazy kinky or dangerous.  So when I say She can do anything She wants to me, I can say it with confidence.

BDSM, and FemDom in particular, has always had negative connotations in many ways.  Even within the BDSM community there can be cliques and judgment.  The classic BDSM dynamic of dominant men and submissive women seems to be the accepted “norm”.  Female submissives in particular can be guilty of this.  Many female subs will always refer to the submissive as ” she”.  I know most don’t mean anything by it, it seems to be an automatic thing.  But it can leave us male sub’s feeling excluded, on the outside looking in.  Like we’re in a separate category.  A sub category, if you will.  Many female sub’s seem to have that traditional viewpoint: men are supposed to be “strong”, dominant and women are supposed to be ” weak” and submissive.  Well, I don’t feel weak.  In fact no submissive is ever weak.  There is strength in submission.  The strength in knowing and accepting who you are, your true nature.

I know many female sub’s are accepting and welcoming of their submissive brothers and I’m certainly not attacking female subs at all.  Far from it.

Whether you are a dominant man/woman, a submissive man/woman, a Cissy, a cross dresser, whatever your kink might be, it’s all covered in the BDSM umbrella.  All should be welcomed and accepted equally.  We all have to worry about people outside the lifestyle judging us.  Within the BDSM community there should only be acceptance.

Deepening The Connection

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I haven’t blogged for a while.  Partly because there hasn’t really been that much to blog about.  Our lives are so crazy with demands on our time coming from so many areas that we’ve barely had time for each other.  Even when we went away for a business convention last week we were so busy that we didn’t even have time to play. 

At all.

So a few days ago, on our wedding anniversary, we made a pledge to get back to basics.   And how!  The other night I received 25 hard strokes of the paddle for something that happened while we were away.  I hadn’t been spanked for a while so it really hurt!  The marks have only just faded from that one.  It’s a measure of how hard the paddling was, because my bottom is usually white again the day after a spanking!

I’m making much more of a conscious effort to completely submit to Mistress.  She does own me, after all.  Last night I pampered Her for three hours, massaging Her feet, stroking Her hair, rubbing Her back.

I HATE feet!

I usually never go near Her feet, or anyone’s feet.   But last night I was the one who volunteered.  And for some reason I enjoyed it.  I still hate feet.  But I enjoyed doing something for Mistress that I don’t like doing, because I was doing something for Her that She enjoyed. 

That’s the mark of a true submissive isn’t it?  Doing something you don’t like because your Dominant wants / likes it.  You might not like doing it but you enjoy that you’re doing it for them. 

I seem to be sinking deeper into my submission to Mistress.  The other day I asked Her how far and how deep She wants to go with this.  I won’t lead Her.  This is, after all, Hers to control.  As long as She understands I’m willing and happy to do whatever She wants me to do.  This is our lifestyle now and I couldn’t be happier.

An Anniversary

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So, today is a special day. It was exactly a year ago today that I had a heart to heart talk with my wife and She took me as Her slave. I can’t believe it’s been a year already. Talk about how time flies! I wish I could say it has always gone smoothly. But every relationship has its ups and downs. What hasn’t helped is all the stress we’ve been under lately. 2014 has been a horrific year for us stress wise. We have situations hurling themselves at us from all angles. It’s been hard to take time to stop and breathe let alone indulge in our D/s lifestyle. But each day I wear my collar with love and pride.

Mistress, I know I haven’t always been the perfect slave I long to be, but I pledge to take this anniversary and use it to strengthen my submission to You. We will get through all these trying times together. Because together we are stronger than anything that life can throw at us. I am, and always will be, Your slave. I live to serve You. To make You happy. To please You in any way that You desire. I am Yours to command.

Always.

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